Thursday, July 24, 2008

I Know This May Seem Coincidental & Such...


I haven't written in SO long...mainly because I didn't have anything to say. No questions...no thoughts...nothing. Very much just blah about a lot of things. Since the last time I wrote, much of my confusion has been erased ::praise Jeru:: Though it's had to knock me up against my head a few times, I'm convinced "When people show you who they are the first time, believe them." I've also realized that whenever I'm confused about a situtation, if I just sit back, it all figures itself out. And the answer is very plainly written. I mean people who I just talk to every blue moon have been hitting me up and just sharing life stories and experiences and speaking MUCH needed truth. So I'm just gonna say that I'm happy where I am. No particular reason, person, or situation, but I'm happy. Life's good...I'm good.

Now I titled this piece, "I Know This May Seem Coincidental & Such..." because the two questions I have may seem like they're stemmed from CNN's Black in America special. However, I didn't get a chance to catch the entire thing. So, these two questions have been circulating around me and some brotherfriends & sisterfriends of mine for a few weeks and I kept forgetting to put them up here. But last night's special did remind me to make a written note to talk about this today.

Question #1: Is there a difference between being thirsty and being aggressive when pursuing a person you want? (Let me know if clarification is needed.)

Question #2: I've always envisioned myself marrying a Black man, whenever I finally chose to take that next step. However, according to last night's reinforced statistics those chances for me and my girl's who share the same beliefs are not in our favor. I know Black men date and marry outside of their race all of the time. But are there any women who are willing to date AND marry outside of their race since we're at a depletion of Black men? And brotha's chime in on any part of this convo!!!

That's all :)

3 comments:

beautifully_n_wonderfully_made said...

I think that there is a big difference btw bein thirsty and aggressive. When I think of the term agressive I think of a woman simply being straightforward with what and whom she wants. She lets him know exactly what she wants maybe makin the first move and then leaving it up to him. On the other handwhen i think of a thristy woman I think of someone who isnt in control. She is constantly and obsessively pursuin him.

In response to the other question...

From many years of sitting up under many wise and older women in my family I have listened to this type of question being argued about for years. And because I am now a young woman and thinking about marriage and things of that nature I now bring up this topic. I dont believe that I will marry a man who is NOT black! No question about it point, blank. But I dont think the question is are black women willing to date and marry outside of their race. I believe the question should be will other races, white men in particular, be willing to MARRY black women? (of course they have no problem with dating us) I ask that because although black men dont think twice about marrying a white (or other race) woman, its rare that well off white men marry black women....

Unknown said...

I honestly don't think there a difference in the two. Now if you would say Thirsty and persistent....I can see a difference there. Thirsty can be alot...like damn...persistency can go a long way...if a chick is persistent with me, that implies a genuine interest.

#2.
I personally don't see anything wrong with dating/marrying outside your race....love isn't a color yo....because of that "color" ish, people miss what could have been the "one". I won't limit myself because of what someone else thinks...

The Aesthetic Leo said...

I think there is a difference between being thirsty and being aggressive, but this is a VERY thin line! Being thirsty, to me, is a woman whom no matter WHAT is GOING to get A guy, she's going to do whatever it takes....she's a fiend, she's an addict, she's even a stalker to a certain extent. But being aggressive is seeing something you want and taking initiative to get it. I guess being OVER aggressive is what leads someone to being classified as thirsty.

With regards to the second question, I feel like black women date outside of their race too. There's a shortage of GOOD black men AND women; therefore, this has led for us to search outside of our race for love, companionship, trust, etc. However, I don't get caught up in the hype of statistics, documentaries, etc. because they all have a bias and none are going to be 100%. I don't feel there IS a NEED to date outside your race to find what you're looking for, but the chances of you getting it ARE higher. There are enough good black men to match with the good black women out there; just gotta put in that extra effort to find them.